I consider myself a woman or cis-woman and my pronouns are she/her. You made some important points about gender categories. Honestly, I am open to whatever method makes people feel the most comfortable. I do not want to live in a gender-neutraal society because I think that would make LBGT and transpeople's gender identity irrelevant and people would pretend they are not impacted by gender. I think we should not try to over-simply gender. Instead, I choose to respect the identity each person chooses fro themselves.
As a writer, I can always find out how someone wants to be referred to and in that way, show my respect for them. Thanks for writing this thought-provoking piece.