Dr. Allison Wiltz
2 min readSep 12, 2020

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I feel mixed feelings about non-binary bathrooms. I think that non-binary people deserve to go to the bathroom where they feel more comfortable.

But, consider that no one can decide if someone is binary or not. Women have been raped in bathrooms and while incarcerated by men who were non-binary.

I think that every time this conversation comes up, women's concerns are completely disregarded and I think it is unfortunate we are only viewing it from one side "the non-binary person's comfort" instead of any safety concerns. Now, I am not insinuating that non-binary men rape men at any higher rate than binary men. But, a woman gets raped in the United States every 2 minutes so I am really sensitive to insinuating there is no harm caused by uni-sex bathrooms.

I think that this is the harm that could be caused. Just because someone is non-binary does not mean they embody all the positive things that we want to believe about them. Every person is different and the your question kind of implies that all non-binary people are oppressed and therefore incapable of harm.

However, Black men are oppressed and they still harm Black women. I have been raped by a Black man and I have also seen a non-binary man beat the hell out of a woman when I was a youth and in jail. She threw the girls tampons at her (I'm choosing she out of respect for what I think she would like to be called). We first learned that she was non-binary when she peed standing up. It was off putting since there were no stalls but none of us cared.

However, when she started attacking the girl it was terrifying. I became angry that they put her in the same jail with us because I thought they really couldn't give a damn less what happened to us. When the officers came in to break it up, they acted like it was. a fair fight. The girl who got beat up was bloody and she was made to sleep on the floor. The non-binary man did not let her sleep on her bunk and there was nothing as women we felt we could do about it.

To me, I am on board to fight for any law that will make non-binary people more accepted but I think that we start to go awry when we ignore the concerns of women and try to portray any opposition to non-binary facilities as bigoted. What do you think? I am really trying to be an ally but do my feelings in this matter betray the cause?

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Dr. Allison Wiltz
Dr. Allison Wiltz

Written by Dr. Allison Wiltz

Black womanist scholar with a PhD from New Orleans, LA with bylines in Oprah Daily, Momentum, ZORA, Cultured. #WEOC Founder

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